Strike up the band! Sharpen your pencils! It’s time to show the world that:
MAGIC HAPPENS WHEN YOU MAKE EVERY WORD COUNT

Today is the day, dear friends! Ready! Set! Go!
The #50PreciousWords 2019 Writing Contest is now OPEN!

For those of you who have not participated before, let me give you a bit of back story. March 2nd is the birthday of the incredible Theodore Geisel, better known as Dr. Seuss. For the last three years, I’ve hosted a little contest based on Bennet Cerf’s challenge to Seuss to write a children’s book using only 50 words. To answer that challenge, Seuss wrote Green Eggs and Ham. It’s true that the story has over 700 words…but only 50 unique words.
In 2016, I thought it would be fun to try to write a story for kids with ONLY 50 words. With a beginning, a middle, and an end. I wondered if I could do it. And then I opened the challenge to everyone. Much to my surprise and amazement, there were 128 entries! The next year, there were 253 entries. And last year, there were 298.
To backtrack a bit, in 2012 I had a dream. I wanted to write picture books. And I wanted to be traditionally published.
And one of the most important things I did was to participate in writing challenges like Susanna Hill’s contests.
Why was that important?
Because it got me writing. It got me revising. It got me submitting.
Hmmm….writing/revising/submitting. I believe that if we do those three things enough times, our writing improves and agents and editors get a chance to see our work. And as much as I am thrilled with my own success, nothing makes me happier than to hear about the success of others in our kidlit community.
So, please sharpen your pencils. Fire up your computers. And share your #50PreciousWords with us.
#50 PRECIOUS WORDS WRITING CHALLENGE GUIDELINES
- Write a story appropriate for kids ages 12 or under, using only 50 words…they can all be different words, or you can use some of them over and over…just as long as the total word count of the story is 50 or less.
- It can be prose, rhyme, free verse, silly or serious…whatever works for you.
- Title is not included in the word count.
- No illustration notes please.
- IMPORTANT: Post your story in the comment section below. If you have your own blog and want to post your story there also, please do. And let us know your post link. I ask for the link so that people will visit each other and find new friends in the kid lit community. But no matter how many other places you want to post your story, make sure at least one of those places is in the comment section of this blog post…and please make sure you put your name in the post because some of you have very creative emails/avatar names and I won’t know who you are. If you have any trouble at all posting the story, please email me and I will be happy to do it for you: viviankirkfield@gmail.com.
- Deadline for posting the story in the comments is Wednesday, March 6, at 11:59pm. And if you plan to ask me to post it for you, please send it at least the day before.
- As many of you know, I am in New Zealand right at this moment on a round the world trip of a life-time. I am hoping to announce the winners on March 16th, but I ask for your patience and understanding in case something comes up and it doesn’t happen that day. Also, although I will be posting the winners on March 16th, I won’t start awarding the prizes until after I return home, on April 8th. But believe me, these prizes will be worth the wait!
- When I do start contacting the winners, 1st place will choose whichever prize he/she wants. Then I will contact 2nd place with the remaining prizes to choose from. And so on down the line. And here, for your dining and dancing pleasure are the wonderful prizes.
- A critique from Storm Literary Agency partner Vicki Selvaggio who is one of the finest agents and loveliest people I know.

- A picture book or chapter book or MG critique with Clear Fork editor Callie Metler-Smith.

- A seat in Susanna Leonard Hill’s MAKING PICTURE BOOK MAGIC: This is the first picture book writing class I took in February 2014..it was a stellar foundation and it has served me well. Susanna is an amazing mentor and a seat in her class can be life-changing!

- A seat in Mira Reisberg’s Children’s Book Academy class on HUMOR – how to find it in your heart and how to write it into your picture books. I have not taken this class yet…but I know I should: https://childrensbookacademy.teachable.com/p/let-s-get-funny-writing-humor-for-kids1

- A complimentary viewing of Alayne Kaye Christan’s latest webinar: Top Ten Reason’s for Rejections.
If you want tips on some corrective action that you might take to improve your chances of submission success, and/or if you would like to deepen your understanding of plot and arc, this webinar is for you.

Alayne Kay Christian is the content and developmental editor for Blue Whale Press and an award-winning children’s book author. She is the creator and teacher of a picture book writing course, Art of Arc. She has been a professional picture book and chapter book critique writer since 2014. And worked as a critique ninja for Julie Hedlund’s 12 X 12 for three years. Alayne is a graduate of the Institute for Children’s Literature and she has spent the last eleven years studying under some of the top names in children’s literature.
- Picture Book manuscript critique from author Lindsay Metcalf
Photo courtesy: Anna Jackson Photography
Lindsay H. Metcalf is a children’s author, poet, reporter, and former editor for The Kansas City Star. She will debut with two nonfiction picture books in 2020. In the fall of that year, Charlesbridge will release Taking the Mic: Fourteen Young Americans Making History, a poetic anthology co-edited by Lindsay, Jeanette Bradley, and Keila V. Dawson, and illustrated by Bradley. It features fourteen contemporary young activists, each spotlighted by a well-known poet. Subjects include literacy activist Marley Dias, water protector Jasilyn Charger, Scout for Equality founder Zach Wahls, and immigration reformer Viridiana Sanchez Santos. Contributors include Nikki Grimes, Joseph Bruchac, Lesléa Newman, and Guadalupe García McCall. Details about Lindsay’s second nonfiction picture book will be forthcoming. To learn more about her books and paid critique services, please reach out on lindsayhmetcalf.com or on Twitter @lindsayhmetcalf.
- Picture Book manuscript critique from author Melissa Stoller.

Melissa Stoller is the author of the chapter book series The Enchanted Snow Globe Collection – Book One: Return to Coney Island and Book Two: The Liberty Bell Train Ride (Clear Fork Publishing, 2017 and 2019); and the picture books Scarlet’s Magic Paintbrush and Ready, Set, GOrilla! (Clear Fork, 2018). Upcoming releases include Return of the Magic Paintbrush and Sadie’s Shabbat Stories (Clear Fork, 2019). She is also the co-author of The Parent-Child Book Club: Connecting With Your Kids Through Reading (HorizonLine Publishing, 2009). Melissa is an Assistant and Blogger for the Children’s Book Academy, a Regional Ambassador for The Chapter Book Challenge, a Moderator for The Debut Picture Book Study Group, and a volunteer with the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators/MetroNY. Melissa has worked as a lawyer, legal writing instructor, freelance writer and editor, and early childhood educator. Additionally, she is a member of the Board of Trustees at The Hewitt School and at Temple Shaaray Tefila. Melissa lives in New York City with her husband, three daughters, and one puppy.
http://www.facebook.com/MelissaStoller
http://www.twitter.com/melissastoller
http://www.instagram.com/Melissa_Stoller
http://www.pinterest.com/melissa_Stoller
- Picture Book manuscript critique from author Amber Hendricks.

- Picture Book manuscript critique from author Sherry Howard.

Sherry Howard lives in Middletown, Kentucky, in a household busy with kids and pets. She worked as an educator, and now has the luxury of writing full time. Her debut picture, Rock and Roll Woods, released in October, 2018. And her middle grade NF, Deep Sea Divers, just released. She has quite a few books in the pipeline for publication soon.
Sherry Howard | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram
Meet Kuda and Rock and Roll Woods here.
- Picture Book manuscript critique from author Julie Abery.

Mother. Writer. Teacher of the very young. I live in Switzerland with my partner and Tilly, the Springer Spaniel.
I ❤️ my job (it’s not every day you get to be an honorary five year old!)
I ❤️ chocolate (I live in Switzerland after all!)
I ❤️ walking the dog (well, I did eat all the chocolate!)
I ❤️ picture books!
If you would like to learn more about me, please visit
http://www.stormliteraryagency.com/our-authors-and-artists/
- Picture book critique from author Tina Cho.

Tina Cho is the author of four picture books– Rice from Heaven: The Secret Mission to Feed North Koreans (Little Bee Books/Bonnier Publishing August 2018), Korean Celebrations (forthcoming Tuttle 2019), Breakfast with Jesus (forthcoming Harvest House 2020), and a new sale yet to be announced. Although she grew up and taught in the United States, she currently lives in South Korea with her husband and two children while teaching at an international school.
- Picture book critique from author Carrie Finison.

Carrie Finison began her literary career at the age of seven with an idea, a box of markers, and her father’s typewriter. She has been writing off and on ever since, though she has (somewhat regretfully) traded in the typewriter for a laptop. Her poems and stories for children have appeared in Babybug, Ladybug, High Five, and Highlights magazines, and her debut picture book,DOZENS OF DOUGHNUTS, illustrated by Brianne Farley, will be published by Putnam in 2020. She lives outside Boston with her husband, son, daughter, and two cats who permit her to write in their cozy attic office. Find her online atwww.carriefinison.com or on Twitter @CarrieFinson.
- Picture book critique from Maria Marshall

Maria is a children’s author, blogger, and poet passionate about making nature fun for children. She was a round 2 judge for the 2018 & 2017 Cybils Awards. And a judge for the #50PreciousWords competition since its inception. Two of her poems are published in The Best Of Today’s Little Ditty 2016 and 2014-2015 anthologies. She is the parent of two amazing adults and lives in the Pacific Northwest with two Pixie Bob cats. When not writing, critiquing, or reading, she bird watches, travels the world, bakes, and hikes. The Picture Book Buzz
Website Facebook Twitter Instagram
- Signed copy of book by Laura Sassi

Laura Sassi has a passion for telling stories in prose and rhyme. Her picture books include GOODNIGHT, MANGER (Zonderkidz, 2015), GOODNIGHT, ARK (Zonderkidz, 2014), DIVA DELORES AND THE OPERA HOUSE MOUSE (Sterling, 2018) and LOVE IS KIND (Zonderkidz, 2018). She lives in New Jersey with her husband, two children, and a black Cockapoo named Sophie. She is represented by Lara Perkins of the Andrea Brown Literary Agency and you can learn more about her and her books at https://laurasassitales.wordpress.com/
- Signed copy of THE MASTERPIECE by Shelley Kinder

Shelley lives in Indiana with her family and loves writing for little people. Not So Scary Jerry (2017) was her first picture book. The Masterpiece (2018) is her second. Its original version got eleventh place in Vivian’s #50PreciousWords Contest in 2016
A big thank you to all of our amazing prize donors! Much appreciation to illustrator Vicky Fang whose awesome logo graces our challenge! And a grateful thank you to my dear friends and critique buddies, Maria Marshall, Julie Abery, and Diane Tulloch who will be helping me read and comment.
Last year there were almost 2000 comments – ALL OF THEM POSITIVE AND ENCOURAGING! I am so proud to be a part of this amazing kidlit community. Our news stations and politicians could definitely learn something from us.
And before I leave you to post your stories and comment on those you have a chance to read, I thought it would only be fair if I posted my sample of a 50-word story. I hang my head in shame because I am using the same story I wrote for last year’s post. I hope you will forgive me, preparations for my book launches and trip did not allow me time to write a new one, but I did want to put up an example for those who haven’t participated before. And maybe it will be new to them!
WHY THE STARS TWINKLE (49 words)
It was Sun’s birthday.
Moon gathered paper, paint,
glitter and glue to make a card.
But Wind blew.
Glitter and glue covered the stars.
“Now I have no gift for Sun,” cried Moon.
“Twinkling stars are the best present of all,” said Sun.
And Moon glowed all night long.
##
Remember, if you have any questions or concerns, please email me at: viviankirkfield@gmail
I ask for your patience and understanding if I don’t get back to you right away…but please don’t stress…if you write a story and have trouble posting it, just email me. As long as your email gets to me time stamped before the contest closes, I will make sure your story is entered. Right at this moment, I am in Auckland, New Zealand, participating in library and school story times, reading FOUR OTTERS TOBOGGAN: AN ANIMAL COUNTING BOOK, PIPPA’S PASSOVER PLATE, and SWEET DREAMS, SARAH! How lucky can aa girl get???
And I am so looking forward to reading all of your precious words!
Adventure Seeker
By Kimberly Cowger
I’m going on an adventure today.
I will fly with fairies,
swim with sea monsters,
and slay a dangerous dragon.
I will soar the skies on a unicorn,
plunder with pirates,
and drink tea with a T-Rex.
Adventure is everywhere.
All it takes is a trip to my local library.
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Library ‘s are awesome. Imagination is so important. A lovely ode to libraries and stories.
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Absolutely! The local library unlocks all sorts of adventures! Nice job, Kimberly.
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A great story to introduce all the adventure you can find in a library. Captivated and keeps the attention throughout. Children will be asking to go to the library. Good luck!
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I love that all the adventures come from reading! Fun alteration and vivid images.Good job.
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Great job, Kimberly…I’m a lover of libraries and your lyrical images would make for a sweet board book, I think.
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So true, libraries are the best places to go on imaginary adventures. Love it.
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Great concept! Good visuals as well!
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The Pi(e) Problem: an ala mODE to Pi Day
By Sarah Tobias, 50 precious words
My mathematician parents fill their office with equations. They mutter, “Could pi be the solution?” Aha! I’ve got it! I measure, mix, roll and stuff, then wait by the oven. Ding! It’s done. I cut. I plate. I carry it to their office. “I hope this pie solves your problem.”
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Love this. Perfect title.
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Great humor and fun play on words. What a great title. But, now I want pie….
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Mmmm….PIE! I now what I’m getting at break. Good luck!
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Know that is. Ugghh!
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So funny!
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Pie solves many problems-I think this story offered the perfect solution-Such a creative story!
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So clever…and you’ve got a really lovely rhythm to this story, Sarah! And now we ALL want pie!!! 😉
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Very clever piece in just 50 words. Now for a piece of pie.
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Starlight Bungalow
by Kathi Morrison-Taylor
Whistle, train whistle,
train whistle fading slow.
Sleepy child sways
in the midnight moonglow.
“Where are you going?”
asks Mama’s radio.
Whistle, train whistle:
“To the starlight bungalow
“To perform with gentle dreamers
in their sleepy-bye play,
to tiptoe, soft-shoe, waltz
till Papa’s whistle lights the day.
LikeLiked by 11 people
So lyrical. You don’t often think of a whistle as a lullaby to sleep, but I have heard the bedtime whistles of the trains passing through town and you captured it beautifully.
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Thanks! Your Pi(e) Problem is darling:)
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Love your lyrical wording on this one.
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Beautiful lyricism! I love the imagery of a starlight bungalow. So much illustration potential!
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I really like the lyricism of the “midnight moonglow” and “starlight bungalow.” And they conjure some fun images. Such a nice, sweet sleepy time story.
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Trains go through the town we live in and the sound of the train whistle is actually comforting- great imagery!
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So beautiful and lyrical! This would surely lull a little one to sleep.
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Great job Kathi! I love the beautiful language and the sleepy-time imagery.
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Ahhh…what a dreamy lyrical piece, Kathi…I love it! You’ve captured the musicality of a train whistle and the bit of mystery as the train to somewhere passes by. Well done!
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This is beautiful Kathi. Such a sweet slumber story for bedtime. .
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Nothing more comforting than hearing the train whistle late at night in the distance and sense the rocking of the train cars- great idea!
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Chloe’s Pencils
Chloe loved to draw. She drew remarkable pictures with pencils of every color.
Her pictures were Beautiful!
Chole’s family suggested, “We think other things are brighter.
Paint, markers, chalk and watercolors would make your pictures dazzling,” they said.
Chloe said, “Thank you, but Pencils are the best for me!”
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Decisive, artistic, Chloe. Good for her for knowing what she likes.
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Thank You
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Great story for encouraging kids to stay true to themselves and their talents.
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Thank you!
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Good for Chloe…she knows who she is and what she needs! So happy you shared your precious words with us, Janet!
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I love drawing with pencils too. Good for her standing up for what she wants. love this story.
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Thank you for your very nice comment. One of my PreK students gave me the idea. She likes pencils the best.
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Thank you for your nice coments.
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Elisha’s Birthday Party
by, Lynn Katz
Squirrels scampered under the baffle, beneath the sparrows.
They jumped and they jostled, they leaped and they toppled.
A feast swayed gently in the winter breeze, out of reach.
Elisha spread seeds over the snow, like sprinkles on her birthday cake.
“Everyone’s welcome,” she said. “Now, the party can begin.”
LikeLiked by 9 people
Great story. Sounds like my backyard. In winter, we have about 12 squirrels feasting under the birdfeeders.
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Good imagery.
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Great verb choices!
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My neighbor would love Elisha. He adores the squirrels and chases off the birds. You perfectly captured the squirrel’s actions, great word choice.
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Thanks so much for you kind feedback!
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What a special birthday party, Lynn. I love that Elisha shares with the animals in the winter! And you’ve got some really nice phrasing: They jumped and they jostled…they leaped and they toppled. Well done!
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Thank you for your 36 precious words of encouragement. You are awesome and you made my day!
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Love this and I also loved that second line. Nice action, Lynn.
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UP THE HILL
By Linda Staszak 44 words
Pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal,
Pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal,
Pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal,
Pedal, pedal, pedal.
Pedal, pedal.
Pedal.
Wheeeeee!
Again!
Pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal,
Pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal,
Pedal, pedal, pedal, pedal,
Pedal, pedal, pedal.
Pedal, pedal.
Pedal.
Wheeeeee!
Done.
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It does take a lot of pedaling to get up the hill…but it’s all worth it with the coasting on the way down…wheeee! Thanks for joining in the fun, Linda. 🙂
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This makes me feel like a kid again. I remember it well. Thanks for the reminder. Fun!
All the best,
Lily
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This is a fun visual story showing the reward gained by a bit of work. Nice job.
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This was a fun read. Really caught my attention. 🙂
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GETTING A SHOT
(50 words)
by Vernon Cole
I’m at the doctor
for a check-up.
If I see a needle,
I’ll holler like a nut.
This is silly!
Don’t you agree?
It’s a tiny cough.
Nothing’s wrong with me!
Supposedly it’s for the better.
Hmph! I think not.
I truly dread
getting a shot.
LikeLiked by 10 people
Very funny and something many kids relate to and probably say the same things. Sounds like my son negotiating not to get it done. Good luck!
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Thank you.
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Haha, this is super cute. This is exactly how my son responds to going to the doctor. “Nothing’s wrong with me!” Well done. Good luck!
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Thank you kindly.
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Great voice! Very relatable for kids.
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Thank you kindly. 😊
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This is funny, Vernon, and oh so like many children! Nice job! Glad you gave the contest a shot! 😄
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Thanks. I happened upon it and figured, why not? Best wishes on yours as well. 😊
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Worse part of the visit for sure. You’ve definitely captured the child’s voice and
its wheedling to get out of needing a shot. Nicely done.
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Thank you Maria. 😊
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How funny! Reminds me of my own kids screaming before the shot was even given.
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In an extended version of this piece, he’s screaming “Ow” already in the car on the way there. 🤣
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I can relate to this story. =) Good luck!
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Thanks so much. 😊
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I love this topic, Vernon! There are not enough stories about getting a shot, haha! Such a relatable topic. Great job!
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Thank you. I’m glad you enjoyed it. 😊
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Definitely something we can ALL relate to…I’m not a fan of shots either! So glad you joined in the fun, Vernon!
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Yes, thank you for hosting the opportunity. Enjoy your trip. 😊
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oh I can soooo relate. I’m sure kids will relate to this.
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Thank you. 😊
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WASHOUT by Martha Seif Simpson
Rain, rain
What a pain
My school vacation’s
Down the drain.
Grandma tells me
“Don’t complain”
But all this rain
Is inhumane.
I think that I
Will go insane
From five full days of
Pouring rain.
I wish someone
Would please explain
When there’s no school
Why must it rain?
LikeLiked by 14 people
Loved the topic and rhyme. My son gets upset when it rains lol. Great job! Good luck!
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Thanks. I figured most kids can relate.
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Nice rhyme and rhythm. This could be the “school song” in the PNW! Love how you got “inhumane” in there. What a fun piece.
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Thanks for your kind words!
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This is super cute! Great rhyme and rhythm. It has such a happy feel!
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Great rhyming!
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We’ve been having lots of rain here, too- relatable! Nice work!
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What fun…great rhyme and such a universal theme. Well done, Martha!
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Thanks, Vivian and everyone else! Your comments are encouraging!
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Loved the rhyming and topic. Great visuals too. Very kid related. Nice job.
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SALTY AND SWEET
By Kari Ann Gonzalez
Toast admired cupcake.
Cupcake was fancy and sweet.
Toast was plain,
Smeared with peanut butter.
And he felt salty.
Until… Toast had a sweet idea.
He cartwheeled to the pantry.
Squish! Flip! Drizzle!
Toast beamed sweetly under
Peanut butter, banana, and honey.
Cupcake admired Toast.
Toast was so sharp.
LikeLiked by 11 people
“And he felt salty” makes me laugh every time. Nicely done!
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Fun story for kids to explore textures and tastes. That cartwheeling piece of toast makes such a fun image.
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This is really cute, Kari! love the short, sharp lines! Nice job!
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A great combination. Good luck, Kari.
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Toast and Cupcake as main characters-I smiled the whole time I was reading your clever story-Well done!
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I like the sensations you used–like sweet and salty. Fun story!
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What’s up with all of these food entries? Now I am totally wishing I had some toast and peanut butter/banana/honey…sounds yummy and your story has wonderful images and lots of great action!
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Love this. So cleverly done. Loved that toast cartwheeled to the pantry and came out all sticky and sweet so cupcake would notice him. Hilarious.
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Pingback: Moose Loves to Swim – #50PreciousWords Contest Entry – KaleeGwarjanski.com
Moose Loves to Swim
by Kalee Gwarjanski
Moose loves to swim.
But Moose wants a friend.
Duck deep dives for fish.
Moose can’t.
Crayfish crawls on the rocky bottom.
Moose can’t.
Bass hides in the reeds.
Moose can’t.
Beaver splashes a big splash.
Moose can!
Moose and Beaver swim and splash together.
http://kaleegwarjanski.com/2019/03/03/moose-loves-to-swim-50preciouswords-contest-entry/
LikeLiked by 9 people
Really cute idea, Kalee! I love the three attempts to find a friend, and I love that the thing Moose can do is make a big splash. Kids would love that!
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Love that moose finally finds someone who plays the same way. Fun story
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This is lovely, Kalee. Nice repeating phrase, simple friendship theme. Lovely visuals. Nice job!
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Thank you for the kind words everyone!
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What a lovely friendship story! And I loved that you used some different creatures…like bass and crayfish. Nice job!
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Very kid appropriate and I love that Moose eventually found a friend and something he could join in with. Loved this.
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DRIP!
by Moni Ritchie Hadley
(49 Words)
Drip!
chocolate mouth
chocolate nose
chocolate hands
chocolate shirt
chocolate pants
chocolate shoes
Uh-Oh…
ANTS!
RUN!
down the hill
through the garden
over the hedge
on the trike
around the house
down the steps
into the pool…
SPLASH!
chocolate Water…
wet socks
wet pants
wet shirt
wet head
Drip!
LikeLiked by 13 people
The double drip is fun. I enjoyed the action’s crescendo in an ant attack and flight to a pool. Sounds like a great summer day. Good luck.
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Thanks Maria!
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Great story Moni! It has good imagery and nice structure and I like how it comes full circle with the ‘drip’. Good luck!
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Great imagery!
All the best,
Lily
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Thank you Lily. I enjoyed your foodie blog!
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Thanks so much Sarah!
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Super cute! I like that you begin and end with Drip, and like Maria mentions all the action created by short, sharp phrases of the ant attack.
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Thanks Julie!
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Oh dear…I totally understand about dripping chocolate…it happens every time we get ice cream during the summer! Short punchy lines provide a great quick beat for the race to the pool. Lots of fun, Moni!
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Thanks Vivian! This is such a fun contest! Thanks for the opportunity!
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Nice, Moni! 🙂
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Thanks Katrina! What is the name of your story?
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This was a really fun read. Great movement through the piece. Lots of action and fun. Nice job.
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Thank you Diane!
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THE TRIP
by Kelly Conroy
http://kellyconroybooks.com/2019-50preciouswords/
47 words
I see
my friends.
I prance.
I skip.
The tree
roots rise.
Toe hits.
I trip.
I jump
back up.
I look
around.
Did they
see me
fall to
the ground?
They point
and laugh,
but I’m
okay.
So I
laugh too
and then –
we play.
LikeLiked by 11 people
Gotta be able to laugh at ones self. I keep snickering over the “the tree roots rise.” Really cute story.
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Thank you!
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Sweet one! 🙂
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Thanks, Mandy!
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I think this is super cute. Great rhythm! Nice job.
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Thank you!
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Great rhythm…and the rhyme is lots of fun…glad there is a happy ending and the friends get to play together. Thanks for sharing your precious words, Kelly.
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Thank you, Vivian! And thanks for the opportunity!
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Ha very relatable. I’ve had many a tree root rise up at me. A great story of showing how to laugh at ones self. Nice job.
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Hand in Hand by Deborah Holt Williams (50 words)
“Hold my hand, Olivia.”
“Why, Dylan?”
“There might be dragons at the park. Don’t be scared.”
“Dragons? I’m not scared!”
“You better hold my hand. There might be monsters.”
“Monsters? I’m not scared!”
“YOU BETTER HOLD MY HAND SO YOU DON’T LOSE ME!”
“Ooooh, Dylan. THAT’S scary! Let’s hold hands.”
LikeLiked by 11 people
Such a great image of trying to get a younger sibling to hold hands. You really capture the voices and exasperation. Nice job.
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I love the repetition! And there is quite a lot of emotion packed into these 50 words…well done, Deborah!
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A lovely relatable story of sibling relationship. Lovely visuals. Great job.
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#50 Precious Words Comp
Maia’s Maori Friend by Diane Tulloch 49words.
Sulphur stench.
Water bubbles.
Maia treads on wooden path.
Thick fog of steam swoops,
and whispers round her.
In distance a small figure kneels.
Hope they don’t fall in.
Maia races forward.
Steam parts to reveal a friend.
Black pot on end of stick,
cooks dinner for him and her.
Thank you for the opportunity Vivian.
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Such an interesting, teasing story. The tension and fear are palpable. But I have to admit, sulphur and dinner don’t sound appetizing to me. Though I would love to see this expanded, so we get more of the culture. Fun story Diane.
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Thanks Maria.
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The sulphur and bubbles sounds a bit like Rotorua! You have captured a whole story in so few words. Nice job, Diane.
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Thank you Julie.
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Love the images that your words bring to mind…and now that I’ve been to the geysers and seen the Maori culture show, I totally can picture it all…well done, Diane!
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Thank you Vivian.
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Lovely language, Diane! I really love the imagery in the line “Thick fog of steam swoops and whispers round her.” Beautiful!
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Thank you Danielle.
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OPERATION CHEDDAR
By Lindsay Fiore (50 words)
Countdown ready,
Whiskers steady.
“Peewee platoon,
Ready the spoon!
5-4-3-2-1! LET’S RUN!”
One plump jump,
Projectiles THWUMP!
Cheese goes ZOOM!
Across the room.
Catch it quick,
That golden brick.
Mission complete.
“Let’s all eat!”
The floor goes CREAK…
The mice say, “SQUEAK!”
Two knees fall weak…
The human screams, “EEK!”
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I think kids would like seeing mice on a mission. Great word choice and I can see some delightful images with this. “Peewee platoon” cracks me up. Good job.
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Thanks, Maria! This tiny army of adorable mice conjured up so many images in my mind. It was a fun story to write!
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I love your description of cheddar as the golden brick! You have managed to capture lots of action in this cute mouse story.
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Thank you!
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Got to love a perfectly ripened cheese story. Good luck!
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Haha! Thanks! Gouda one!
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You know how much I love this story, Lindsay. Such great STEM connections with your ingenious mice!
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Thanks so much, Aimee for your feedback on it! I’ve expanded it and the addition of ‘feta-physics’ has taken it in a ‘hole’ new direction. : P
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You also know how much I love this! Great job, Lindsay!
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Thanks so much, CJ!! : )
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Action packed – What a fun story!
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Very fun!
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Your short punchy lines get us into the action right away…what a fun story, Lindsay. Nice job!
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Eek! Mice running riot does not appeal to me but I’m sure kids will love this. Great visuals of cheese zooms across the floor. Nice job.
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Cloudy days
By Krystal Snead
Drifting across the sky.
Watching children as they play.
“Faster dad, I’m flying high.”
Oops, soggy picnic.
Here comes an angry cloud.
CRASH, what an awful sound!
I ‘m not wanted anywhere.
Wait, droopy flowers.
Sprinkle, sprinkle.
A dog is panting, it’s too hot.
Here’s some shelter, “that better Spot?”
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Wonderful job doing it from the cloud’s POV, though the switch to (through?) the child’s voice as it plays threw me off at first. Very interesting story. Good luck.
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Thank you for your comments.
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Love the story with the POV of the cloud/rain…it might have spoiled the picnic, but the thirsty flowers are happy! Thank you so much for sharing your precious words, Krystal.
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Thank you for your comments.
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Great job taking a clouds pov. Would love to see this expanded into a picture book. Good luck.
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OPERATION CHEDDAR
By Lindsay Fiore (50 words)
Countdown ready,
Whiskers steady.
“Peewee platoon,
Ready the spoon!
5-4-3-2-1! LET’S RUN!”
One plump jump,
Projectiles THWUMP!
Cheese goes ZOOM!
Across the room.
Catch it quick,
That golden brick.
Mission complete.
Let’s all eat!
The floor goes CREAK…
The mice say, “SQUEAK!”
Two knees fall weak…
The human screams, “EEK!”
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This is so much fun, Lindsay! Mice will do anything for cheese and this short story proves it! Way to go!
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This is a really cute story, Lindsay! Love the onomatopoeia and the imagery of a “peewee platoon”.
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Fun story, Lindsay…you’ve captured the plight of a little mouse family…and in rhyme! Well done!
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Lucy’s Knitting Needle
(50 words)
By Katie Walsh
Under a tree, Lucy knitted a scarf for Squirrel.
Lucy measured and weaved.
Animals lined up for garments.
Plink!
Lucy’s needle broke!
Snow sprinkled.
Lucy shivered.
Squirrel got an idea!
He gnawed a twig.
The animals intertwined their garments. A blanket!
No longer cold, Lucy felt warm. Especially, her heart.
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I like the friendship at the end and all the animals pitching in to return her kindness. Nice awww moment. I enjoyed the sprinkling of bigger words, especially intertwined. Good job.
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Thank you so much, Maria!
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Gah! I got so many feels on this one, beautiful, Katie, I’m excited to see this as your next pb draft, yes? Yes!
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Thank you, Kaitlyn! This was such a fun challenge!
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Yeah!
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I love this. Such a heartwarming story :o)
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Thank you, Catherine.
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Hi Katie, this is sweet. Lots of heart! 🙂
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Thank you!
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Love your last line! So sweet. Such a cute image of the animals all cozy under their blanket together!
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Oh, thank you!
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Love how the animals come together to repay Lucy’s kindness. Such a great story of community and kindness. Gook luck in the contest, Katie!
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Thank you, Danielle!
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Beautiful story of friendship. I’d love to see it expanded. Great job!
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Yes, me too! Thank you.
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Wishing there was a grinning from ear to ear button. What a delightful read.
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That’s so sweet! Thank you, Pamela!
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This story has a lot of heart, Katie…and a lot of potential…it reminds me of The Mitten…with an additional theme of kindness repaid. Well done!
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Thank you for the kind words, Vivian. And thank you again for the opportunity to take part in this writing challenge!
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Sweet story. I get a good feel for Lucy, even with just these few words. I hope you take this idea and roll with it. I’d love to read more and get to know Lucy and her animal friends better.
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Thank you, Rhett!
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Loved this. Great visuals and friendship theme. Nice touch at the end with the animals making the blanket for Lucy.
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Thanks, Diane!
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