The Grandma Chronicles: Curtains for Dinner

Posted on January 27, 2011 by viviankirkfield

Image via Wikipedia

I only knew her as GRANDMA.

But she had a life before I ever met her…as an obedient daughter, loving sister, impressionable girl, new bride and mother of five.

She was a woman of character and strength. She was ahead of her time in many ways and I thought she was an angel with super-powers. But “Curtains for Dinner” shows that she was a normal human being, just like any of us…and sometimes she made questionable choices.

As a young woman, my grandmother lived in an era where most wives stayed home and the husband went to work and controlled the family finances. Every week, she would be given a certain amount of money for the household expenses…whatever her husband determined would be enough…if she was a frugal homemaker. And, just like today, it was hard to make the money stretch to buy the staples she needed. One day, on her way to the butcher shop to buy meat for dinner, my grandmother passed a fabric store. Hanging in the store window was the most beautiful piece of lace material and my grandmother knew she had to have it for her kitchen window…to help make her house a more beautiful home. Opening the door, she entered a world of colors and textures…but her eyes were only on the lace in the window. A small scrap of paper pinned to the fabric displayed the cost…25 cents. Reaching her hand into the neckline of her dress, she unpinned the folded handkerchief that held her precious household money. Carefully she opened the scrap of fabric and looked at its contents…only 50 cents, the amount needed to purchase enough meat for dinner that night. What should she do? How could she pass up that beautiful piece of lace? But what would she do about dinner?

Making her decision, she took one of the quarters, approached the store clerk and indicated her choice. Emerging from the fabric store, the parcel of lace clutched tightly in her hands, my grandmother continued down the street to the butcher’s shop. Now she only had enough money for half as much meat. Purchasing the meat, she watched as the butcher wrapped it…what a tiny package it made!

Sitting down to dinner in the kitchen with the new lace curtains fluttering in the breeze, her husband noticed that there was only one place set. “Aren’t you eating, my dear.” he asked. “Oh no,” my grandmother replied. “I was so hungry, I ate my portion earlier.”

My grandmother might have gone to bed with her stomach a little empty…but her desire to beautify her home was well-satisfied.

Did she make the right choice? What would you have done?

Stop by tomorrow for the last installment of The Grandma Chronicles: Where Are the Side-Mirrors on the New Car? I’ll also share a recipe, from my new parenting book. for apple cake just like the one I used to make with her those long-ago Sunday mornings.

God Couldn’t Be Everywhere, So He Created Grandmas

Posted on January 26, 2011 by viviankirkfield

GOD COULDN’T BE EVERYWHERE

SO HE CREATED GRANDMAS

This plaque hangs in my kitchen. It was given to me by my daughter, after her son was born. It is so very meaningful to me, and I smile every time I pass it by, not only because I’m thrilled to be a grandma to one of the world’s most adorable, smart, sweet, loving, handsome, and wonderful little boys in the world, but also because it brings back my memories of my own grandmother.

If I close my eyes, I can still see her, sitting in her antique rattan rocking chair, arms outstretched, ready to enfold any child in need of love and a listening ear.

This amazing woman cherished children and was always eager to praise your drawing made at school even though the people were stick figures and the trees were lopsided, listen to you practice the piano no matter how many wrong notes you hit, or just hold you. She was a role model for Positive Parental Participation in an era before experts were encouraging parents to spend quality time with their children.

When I was ten years old, a wonderful thing happened. My family moved into my grandmother’s house! She was getting older and my parents and my aunts and uncles were uncomfortable having her live on her own. I don’t know how easy it was for my parents to coexist in this multi-generational home, but for my sister and me…it was heaven! Now we could have access to this very special person on a daily basis, not just on weekend visits.

My favorite time was early Sunday mornings. My parents and sister would sleep a little later, but my grandmother was an early riser. I would tip-toe downstairs to the kitchen where I would find her, drinking coffee and dipping her dry bread into it. She would take down an old porcelain cup, pour in a splash of coffee and fill it to the rim with milk and hand it to me. Starbucks’ lovers…eat your hearts out…there is no coffee drink available today that can compare to that nectar from the gods. 😉

After we finished our petit dejeuner or little breakfast, my grandmother would go to the pantry (yes, a real old-fashioned pantry that was like a walk-in closet) and get out bowls, flour, sugar and various other ingredients and we would spend the next few hours preparing apple pies and other amazing dishes. Perhaps that is where I learned my love of cooking and baking and it is definitely one of the reasons I included a cooking activity with each story recommendation in my book for parents of preschoolers. I understand how important it is to participate positively with young children and encouraging your child to help in the kitchen will build self-esteem and create a life-long parent-child bond.

I have two stories to relate about my grandmother…she was only human, after all. One shows that she didn’t always use commonsense, and the other…well, if it happened today and the authorities found out about it, she would probably be in jail. But, it was another time and people had a different mind-set about parenting. Stop by tomorrow to find out about “curtains for dinner” and “the new car that lost its side-mirrors”.

Bedtime…Routines, Rituals and Can I Have One More Glass of Water, Please!!!

Posted on January 24, 2011 by viviankirkfield

Image by National Media Museum via Flickr

I can remember wanting to stay up later when I was a child. And when my children were small, each had their own way of trying to put off going to bed. So I’m sure that many parents today have the same problem…some things just don’t change.

SO HOW CAN YOU GET YOUR CHILDREN TO GO TO BED

WITH NO FUSS OR MUSS?

Unfortunately, I can’t give you any guarantees, but I can offer a few simple steps that worked for me.

1. Provide a balanced and harmonious day…children need to get outside to play if the weather permits…fresh air and physical activity are essential. Indoor play can include arts and crafts, music and rhythms (put on your favorite CD while you and your child dust and dance through the house), puzzles and stories. Just make sure there is a balance of activities during the day. A child who is just sitting around watching TV all day will definitely NOT be ready to go to sleep.

2. As bedtime approaches, have a plan that includes making sure all toys are picked up and put away, bath time or washing up, brushing teeth, putting on pajamas, reading a story, singing a goodnight song, prayers, etc…whatever routines, rituals or bed-time traditions are right for your family. The crucial tip here is to BE CONSISTENT!

3. Have a positive attitude towards going to bed…it is NOT a punishment, but a necessary part of living, just like eating and breathing. During restful sleep, our bodies heal themselves and our minds can dream. Be matter-of-fact and give your child a heads-up as the bed-time countdown approaches.

Because of my passion for picture book stories, I’m always ready to recommend one to help children deal with the challenges they face. If going to bed is a problem in your home, perhaps you can read the following book with your child and make a batch of overnight cookies together.

CORNELIUS P. MUD, ARE YOU READY FOR BED?

written and illustrated by Barney Saltzberg

It’s time for bed and Cornelius’ father asks him the questions which we all ask our children at bedtime. Have you put away your toys? Have you used the bathroom? Have you brushed your teeth? Have you put on your pajamas?

Although the little pig answers each question with a “yes”, the charming illustrations show that he and his father have different ideas about what needs to be done in order to get ready for bed. Cornelius’ understanding father accepts his son’s somewhat strange routine and makes sure that he doesn’t forget the most important thing…a loving hug from him.

Young children want very much to become independent and, although they may put their pajamas on backwards, we need to encourage them to learn to do things by themselves. Of course, parents need to supervise some tasks; we don’t want them swallowing the whole tube of toothpaste or emptying the entire box of fish food into the aquarium. However, praise for good effort encourages a child to keep trying and, as your child masters each task and skill, his self-esteem grows.

OVERNIGHT COOKIES

This recipe is unique because the cookies remain in the oven overnight and are ready in the morning…perhaps your child can have one with breakfast as a special treat…the egg whites, raisins and chopped nuts provide high quality nutrition.

You will need: 2 egg whites, ¼ cup sugar, 1 cup finely ground almonds, 1 cup raisins, cookie sheet covered with aluminum foil and sprayed with canola oil, electric mixer and a large bowl.

1. Beat the egg whites with the mixer until stiff peaks form.

2. Add sugar and mix gently with a spoon.

3. Fold in nuts and raisins.

4. Drop the mixture by the teaspoonful onto the prepared cookie sheet (if you want larger cookies, you can use a bigger spoon).

5. Bake at 350 degrees for 5 minutes. Turn the oven off.

6. Remove the cookies from the oven in the morning (you can actually take them out after an hour…if you like softer cookies).

7. Store in an airtight container.

This child-friendly healthful recipe is only one of the one hundred that appear in SHOW ME HOW! BUILD YOUR CHILD’S SELF-ESTEEM THROUGH READING, CRAFTING AND COOKING.

Stop by tomorrow for a few more thoughts about the importance of a restful sleep (especially for harried moms and dads) AND an eco-friendly craft project to make bed-time the right time for your child.

WE ALL NEED A CHEERING COMMITTEE AND PARENTS ARE A CHILD’S MOST IMPORTANT FANS!