Bedtime…Routines, Rituals and Can I Have One More Glass of Water, Please!!!

Posted on January 24, 2011 by viviankirkfield

Image by National Media Museum via Flickr

I can remember wanting to stay up later when I was a child. And when my children were small, each had their own way of trying to put off going to bed. So I’m sure that many parents today have the same problem…some things just don’t change.

SO HOW CAN YOU GET YOUR CHILDREN TO GO TO BED

WITH NO FUSS OR MUSS?

Unfortunately, I can’t give you any guarantees, but I can offer a few simple steps that worked for me.

1. Provide a balanced and harmonious day…children need to get outside to play if the weather permits…fresh air and physical activity are essential. Indoor play can include arts and crafts, music and rhythms (put on your favorite CD while you and your child dust and dance through the house), puzzles and stories. Just make sure there is a balance of activities during the day. A child who is just sitting around watching TV all day will definitely NOT be ready to go to sleep.

2. As bedtime approaches, have a plan that includes making sure all toys are picked up and put away, bath time or washing up, brushing teeth, putting on pajamas, reading a story, singing a goodnight song, prayers, etc…whatever routines, rituals or bed-time traditions are right for your family. The crucial tip here is to BE CONSISTENT!

3. Have a positive attitude towards going to bed…it is NOT a punishment, but a necessary part of living, just like eating and breathing. During restful sleep, our bodies heal themselves and our minds can dream. Be matter-of-fact and give your child a heads-up as the bed-time countdown approaches.

Because of my passion for picture book stories, I’m always ready to recommend one to help children deal with the challenges they face. If going to bed is a problem in your home, perhaps you can read the following book with your child and make a batch of overnight cookies together.

CORNELIUS P. MUD, ARE YOU READY FOR BED?

written and illustrated by Barney Saltzberg

It’s time for bed and Cornelius’ father asks him the questions which we all ask our children at bedtime. Have you put away your toys? Have you used the bathroom? Have you brushed your teeth? Have you put on your pajamas?

Although the little pig answers each question with a “yes”, the charming illustrations show that he and his father have different ideas about what needs to be done in order to get ready for bed. Cornelius’ understanding father accepts his son’s somewhat strange routine and makes sure that he doesn’t forget the most important thing…a loving hug from him.

Young children want very much to become independent and, although they may put their pajamas on backwards, we need to encourage them to learn to do things by themselves. Of course, parents need to supervise some tasks; we don’t want them swallowing the whole tube of toothpaste or emptying the entire box of fish food into the aquarium. However, praise for good effort encourages a child to keep trying and, as your child masters each task and skill, his self-esteem grows.

OVERNIGHT COOKIES

This recipe is unique because the cookies remain in the oven overnight and are ready in the morning…perhaps your child can have one with breakfast as a special treat…the egg whites, raisins and chopped nuts provide high quality nutrition.

You will need: 2 egg whites, ¼ cup sugar, 1 cup finely ground almonds, 1 cup raisins, cookie sheet covered with aluminum foil and sprayed with canola oil, electric mixer and a large bowl.

1. Beat the egg whites with the mixer until stiff peaks form.

2. Add sugar and mix gently with a spoon.

3. Fold in nuts and raisins.

4. Drop the mixture by the teaspoonful onto the prepared cookie sheet (if you want larger cookies, you can use a bigger spoon).

5. Bake at 350 degrees for 5 minutes. Turn the oven off.

6. Remove the cookies from the oven in the morning (you can actually take them out after an hour…if you like softer cookies).

7. Store in an airtight container.

This child-friendly healthful recipe is only one of the one hundred that appear in SHOW ME HOW! BUILD YOUR CHILD’S SELF-ESTEEM THROUGH READING, CRAFTING AND COOKING.

Stop by tomorrow for a few more thoughts about the importance of a restful sleep (especially for harried moms and dads) AND an eco-friendly craft project to make bed-time the right time for your child.

WE ALL NEED A CHEERING COMMITTEE AND PARENTS ARE A CHILD’S MOST IMPORTANT FANS!

MOMMY, WHERE ARE YOU?

Posted on January 21, 2011 by viviankirkfield

Image via Wikipedia

One of the biggest surprises of motherhood is the 24/7 factor. For nine months, the ears of mothers-to-be are filled with horror stories and tales of sleepless nights and endless days of diapering, rocking and feeding. But somehow, it doesn’t really make an impression until that first sleepless night or endless day.

Maybe that’s how we are wired…otherwise there might be fewer mothers-to-be.

Please don’t misunderstand me. I LOVED being a mother and actually enjoyed many of the nights I sat in the rocking chair, baby in my arms and a good book in my hands. But I know there were days (and nights) when I almost wished I could change my name…mommy, mommy, MOMMY, MOMMY…where are youuuuuuuuu??????

I say almost, because my children have been great joys in my life…now they are grown (two with children of their own) and all of them make me proud that I can say I am their mom.

It’s true, though, that sometimes, as our children are growing up, we may feel we have a shadow…a constant companion, whether we like it or not. How about when you are shopping and have to use the restroom…of course your child MUST come in the stall with you, especially these days! And even at home, many children like to be with mommy wherever she is in the house. This may get a little tiresome, but how would you feel if you turned around, expecting your child to be right behind you, and she was not there?

The following picture book story suggestion addresses this topic. It’s a classic in children’s literature from 1948.

BLUEBERRIES FOR SAL written and illustrated by Robert McCloskey

One summer day, a little girl named Sal goes with her mother to pick blueberries on Blueberry Hill. Since she eats the blueberries almost as quickly as her mother picks them, her mother tells Sal to pick some of her own. Meanwhile, a bear cub is also on a blueberry hunt with his mother. Both Sal and Little Bear become separated from their own mothers and inadvertently begin following the wrong mother. Fortunately, the mix-up is resolved and both Sal and Little Bear are reunited with the correct parent.

Very young children often get anxious when they lose sight of their parents because they are afraid their parents will never return. This story reassures young children that even if that happens (or their parents leave them at daycare when they go to work or with a sitter when they go out for the evening), the separation will only be a temporary one.

After reading the story, perhaps you might want to try this simple cooking activity with your child. Participating positively with young children creates a life-long parent-child bond.

CHILD-FRIENDLY BLUEBERRY MUFFINS

I can still hear the “plink-plink” as the first blueberries of the season my children picked made their way into the containers. At the time, we lived in an old farmhouse in a small Connecticut town. The backyard was a paradise of fruit trees and, best of all, over one hundred blueberry bushes. Here is the blueberry muffin recipe we used.

You will need: 1 cup fresh blueberries, ½ cup sugar, 1 ½ cups flour, ½ tsp baking soda, ½ cup canola oil, 2 eggs beaten, ½ cup milk, 2 bowls and one 12-cup muffin tin.

1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees. Lightly grease the muffin cups. Rinse off the blueberries.

2. In a large bowl, combine flour, sugar and baking soda.

3. In a small bowl, combine oil, milk and beaten eggs.

4. Add liquid ingredients to dry ingredients and stir until just blended.

5. Fold blueberries into the batter and pour batter into prepared pan, filling each cup about 2/3 full.

6. Bake 18-20 minutes or until muffins are lightly browned and cooked through. Insert a toothpick into the center of a muffin…muffins are done if it comes out clean. Turn out of the pan and cool on a rack. Store in an airtight container. The muffins retain their heat for awhile…please let them cool and then cut in half before serving to a young child.

Do you enjoy the combination of story suggestion and related activity? It certainly helped my days feel more organized when my children were growing up. A simple schedule helps bring balance and order to what can often be a chaotic day.

“Be aware of wonder. Life a balanced life – learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.” – Robert Fulghum

Stop by tomorrow for a look at some tips on keeping balance in your life…one day at a time.

Help! Where Am I? I’m Lost!

Posted on January 19, 2011 by viviankirkfield

Image via Wikipedia

It was a cold gray late afternoon in New York City.

I was on my way home from a student teaching assignment in an unfamiliar part of Brooklyn. Leaving the school, I quickly walked to the subway station and boarded the train that would take me home. As the train pulled away from the very next stop, I realized that the name of that station was not one I recognized. Now I watched carefully as the train pulled into the next few stops. More unfamiliar names! A sick feeling formed in the pit of my stomach. I had gotten on the wrong train!

I must admit that I panicked. I got off at the next stop. Instead of finding a uniformed security person and asking which train I should board to return to the right route, I ran up the subway stairs, hailed the first cab that passed by, gave him my address and sat back, heart pounding.

It was an expensive lesson…the cab ride cost me $10 and that was A LOT of money in those days…but I did get home safely, so I guess it was worth it.

Have you ever been lost? Maybe there was a detour and you found yourself driving around and around, wondering which road to take. Perhaps you went for a hike on a park trail and meandered off to look at some interesting rock formations or a bunch of wild flowers and now you are not sure which way to go to return to the main path.

Many young children also worry about getting lost or separated from those they love. Although we want to encourage curiosity and independence, we are responsible for keeping our children safe from harm. Teaching your child his name, address and phone number, and what to do in case he is ever lost is very important and will enable him to feel more confident about his own ability to deal with such a situation. Reassure your child that you will always find him, no matter what…this will contribute to his feeling of safety.

You can also help children talk about their concerns by reading picture book stories that address the issue of getting lost. While you read the story, a window of opportunity for discussion opens…so please take advantage of it. Here’s one story suggestion on that topic:

ANGUS LOST written and illustrated by Marjorie Flack

This is a classic in children’s picture books. The copyright date is 1931 and the illustrations hearken by to a bygone era. That might be part of the charm of the story and you and your child can have a wonderful conversation about how milk was delivered in the olden days. J

Angus, a little terrier, is bored with his home and yard and he decides to see what the world is like. After several scary adventures, Angus wants very much to go home, but he cannot find his way. He spends the night hiding in a cave, trembling in fear the entire time. In the morning, he hears the familiar sound of the milkman’s horse and wagon and he eagerly follows them from house to house as the milkman makes his deliveries. Finally, Angus recognizes his very own yard and is relieved to be home at last.

After you read the story and talk about it, perhaps you and your child would like to make some “real” butter.

CHILD-FRIENDLY HOMEMADE BUTTER

You will need: 1 cup heavy whipping cream, electric mixer and a large bowl.

1. Pour the cream into the bowl and beat on medium until stiff peaks are formed (about 2-3 minutes). This is REAL WHIPPED CREAM!!!

2. Continue beating (4-8 minutes) and you will see the curds separate from the whey. You can sing “Little Miss Muffet” with your child while you are doing this and do the finger play later.

3. Pour off the whey and you will be left with a lump of pure butter.

4. Enjoy with crackers, bread or toast.

5. Put the leftover butter in a covered container and store in the refrigerator.

6. Instead of using the electric mixer, you could put the cream in a glass jar with a lid and shake…but this will take 5-30 minutes…and everyone’s hands will be tired.

Stop by tomorrow for another story suggestion and activity from my book. And I’ll tell you about the time I spent SIX HOURS reading Little Women while my mother and half the staff of a major New York department store searched for me.

WE ALL NEED A CHEERING COMMITTEE AND PARENTS ARE A CHILD’S MOST IMPORTANT FANS!