Dental visits: Pain or Gain?

Posted on July 20, 2010 by viviankirkfield

Yesterday I went to the dentist for my routine cleaning and checkup. Fortunately, everything looked fine. It made me think back to when our children were young and we tried to find a way to encourage them to take care of their teeth. My husband and I came up with an interesting plan: If their checkup showed no cavities, they got five dollars. If they had cavities, they had to pay fifty cents from their allowance for each cavity.

Needless to say, all three had very few cavities as they were growing up. I’m not sure if it was the incentive of receiving five dollars, or if it was having to part with fifty cents for each cavity that encouraged them to brush their teeth regularly and refrain from eating too many sweets.

Our children are all in their 30’s now…two of them have children of their own and are probably dealing with that same age-old issue of getting their little ones to properly care for their teeth. When I talk to my grown children on the phone, if they mention in passing that they have been to the dentist and have had a perfect checkup, I still send them a five dollar bill in the mail. Although five dollars can’t purchase the same amount of goods that it could 20 or 30 years ago, it still buys a good dental checkup.

Hey, where’s my five dollars?

I’d love to hear other parent’s ideas for encouraging children to take good care of their teeth.

Andy Rooney: Life is like a gadget drawer

Posted on July 19, 2010 by viviankirkfield

This morning I wrote a post about yesterday’s 60 Minutes segment with Andy Rooney. As the day went on, I began to think about how a kitchen gadget drawer is a lot like life and parenting. We accumulate “stuff” during our life…material things like cars, homes, appliances, clothing, lamps, and books…sometimes doubles and triples of items we don’t even use. We store up memories, both good and bad (the bad ones sometimes haunting us as we try to move forward with our lives). We hold on to feelings, even the negative ones (sometimes especially the negative ones). And, when it comes to parenting, we often repeat behaviors of our own parents we swore we would never do. Have you ever said something to your child and looked around to see if your mother was standing there, because what came out of your mouth was something you had often heard her say.

I think this happens to most of us. Maybe I can take Andy Rooney’s advice and dump out everything in the drawer (of my behavior, reactions to others, feelings, memories), look it over, and make sure I want to keep it before I put it back.

But I doubt it will be as easy as cleaning the kitchen gadget drawer.

Have you kept your New Year’s resolutions?

Posted on July 18, 2010 by viviankirkfield

Maybe “kept” is the wrong word. Perhaps a better phrase would be “followed through on”. “Kept” might mean you put it in a drawer and forgot about it. Out of sight…out of mind. Do people even make New Year’s resolutions anymore?

I am definitely a “list” person…so making New Year’s resolutions was always something I looked forward to doing. Every year, on January 1st, I’d sit down with a fresh sheet of paper, a sharpened pencil and a heart filled with high hopes and expectations. I’d think about what I wanted to accomplish in my life for the up-coming year…healthwise, emotionally and academically. Drink 8 glasses of water every day. Get to bed early. Walk or exercise daily for at least 30 minutes. Be compassionate. Speak kindly to others. Read something uplifting every day.

When my children were growing up, we sat down once or twice together and made our New Year’s resolutions. I think this was a wonderful family activity that might create a better parent-child bond…sharing the lists might help parents learn more about who their children are…and might help children learn more about who their parents are.

As I’ve matured, most of the items on the list have remained the same. But, I’ve added others. Stretch my mind. Do things that are outside my comfort zone. Stand up for what I believe. Speak out when I should. And, just as importantly, keep quiet when I should. (Good advice to parents of grown children)

Do I follow through on all of my resolutions every day of the year? No, I don’t. Do I beat myself up for “dropping the ball” sometimes? A little, but I try not to. Will I make a list of New Year’s resolutions next year? You bet I will. For me, it sets the tone for the direction I want to move in. It encourages me to tackle projects I might otherwise choose to postpone or ignore. It helps me to be a better me.