“I really want to have a baby!”
This is what a co-worker told me the other day. She also told me that her husband is not excited about the idea and she feels he is not ready to be a father. In addition, their relationship is, according to her, not in a very good place right now. And, she complained that she had trouble sleeping at night and didn’t function well if her sleep was disturbed.
Hmmmm….sounds like a recipe for disaster, wouldn’t you agree?
Deciding to have a baby is not like deciding to order fries with your meal or deciding to buy a red dress for a party. When the fries arrive, you can always throw them away if you’ve changed your mind or ask the waitress if you can have a baked potato instead. If the red dress doesn’t look good when you get it home, you can always return it or exchange it for a different one.
Becoming a parent is a forever decision…one not to be taken lightly. The people involved need to understand the implications and agree that it is something they both wish to undertake. Of course, sometimes pregnancies are unplanned and a surprise.
I’m always encouraging parents to read picture books with their children because part of my Positive Parental Participation program involves the utilization of the messages in picture books to help young children cope with many of the challenges they face in those early years.
One can say the same thing about movies. And, many movies contain important messages for adults.
My husband and I watched 9 Months with Hugh Grant and Julianne Moore on Netflix last night. If you are contemplating having a baby, this is the movie for you! It’s a light-hearted look at a young successful couple who have been living together very happily for five years. When Julianne discovers she is pregnant, Hugh is not happy about it, but she tells him that the baby won’t change their life. Then she tells him he will have to sell his sports car and get rid of the cat he has had for thirteen years. His disconnect causes her to leave him and she tells him, “You’re not ready to be a father!”
Will Hugh ultimately accept the situation? At the end of the movie, is he ready to be a father? Watch the film if you want a hilarious look at pregnancy, labor and delivery…with Robin Williams as the obstetrician, you are guaranteed to be rolling on the floor, laughing till it hurts.
But the movie has a serious side…it asks couples: are you ready to have a baby? It will change your life. It won’t make a weak marriage stronger. It will test the limits of your patience.
What are your thoughts? Please share them with us.